A Message
by fleurdelis23
Summary: Callie and Arizona have been apart for three years. Can the spirit of the holidays bring them together after all this time?


_Based on the song A Message by Coldplay. All characters belong to Shonda, no infringement intended._

* * *

Arizona sank onto the couch, glass of wine in hand, and flipped on the TV. She found American Bake Off reruns and turned the volume up slightly, but her mind immediately began to wander. Her eyes drifted to stare out the window, taking in the fresh blanket of snow covering her front yard. The windows shone with reflected lights from her beautifully constructed Christmas tree, the base bare and waiting for the numerous presents she had prepared for Sofia to be placed there later tonight.

This was not how her Christmas Eve was supposed to be. She should be spending her night curled up on the couch with her little girl, wrapped up in their Christmas pajamas and sipping hot chocolate as they watched their favorite Christmas movie. Her house should be full of laughter and joy as Sofia begged to stay up later to see Santa and her excitement for Christmas morning kept her awake way past her bedtime. Arizona laughed to herself thinking about all of the previous Christmas Eve nights when she had had to negotiate with Sofia to get her into bed in the first place. Her daughter had so much love for Christmas, something Arizona herself shared, and she wished more than anything that she could be experiencing her daughter's excitement along with her at this very moment. But here she was, sitting in her empty house alone on Christmas Eve, wishing more than anything that things were different.

Part of Arizona's arrangement with Callie was that Sofia would spend the holidays in Seattle this year. Both women had agreed that Sofia was much too young to fly cross-country alone, so Callie had agreed to bring Sofia to Arizona a few days before Christmas to give the blonde more alone time to spend with her daughter. The thought of uninterrupted time with Sofia had been all that had gotten Arizona through the past few weeks. She missed her daughter more than anything and while coming home to an empty, quiet house everyday had become her norm, she had never fully gotten used to it. She had been so ready to have her daughter in Seattle with her and to be able to wrap her up into the biggest hug whenever she wanted, but as she sat alone on her couch the evening of Christmas Eve, her hopes began to diminish.

Callie had had flights booked two days prior, but a high profile patient and a very demanding boss had grounded her in New York for an extra two days. Callie had called, extremely apologetic and Arizona, while reasonably upset, had had no choice but to be okay with the situation. Callie promised to fly with Sofia to Seattle on Christmas Eve and while Arizona had been reluctant to agree to Callie traveling across the country and leaving her holiday plans the day before Christmas, Callie had insisted. Arizona's Skype session with Sofia later that same night had been filled with tears from the little girl and comforting words from Arizona, promising to make up for lost time. Arizona had struggled to hold her emotions back for Sofia, trying her best to stay strong and not show how upset she really was until after Sofia hung up for the night. Arizona had rearranged her shifts at the hospital, working the days before Christmas she was originally supposed to have with Sofia and taking some more days off after Christmas, filling those days with plans for mother daughter activities she knew Sofia would love. However, as the afternoon turned to evening, she was getting less and less optimistic that Sofia would be here before Christmas day. The snow had started to fall earlier that day and Seattle was now covered in at least 3 inches of snow. Callie had let Arizona know earlier that day that their flight had left New York, but Arizona had not heard any news since and part of her was worried that the flight would have to be rerouted to avoid the snow. As the hours passed and no update from Callie came, Arizona lost more and more hope that she would see her little girl in time for Christmas.

Arizona jumped as a knock on her door sounded throughout the house and she rushed to get off the couch, a smile overtaking her face. She threw open the door to see her ex-wife holding Sofia's hand, the little girl smiling ear to ear as well. "Mommy!" She yelled, running across the threshold and into Arizona's waiting arms. "Hi sweet girl," Arizona said as she bent down to welcome her daughter home, breathing in her signature Sofia scent and holding on to her as tight as she could.

"I missed you mommy," Sofia said as she nuzzled into Arizona's shoulder, the blonde squeezing her tighter.

"I missed you too baby girl. How was the flight?"

"I colored and mama let me eat peanut M&M's but I wish it had gone faster. I really wanted to see you," Sofia said, tightening her grip on Arizona.

Arizona looked up at Callie, who was smiling at the mother daughter exchange. The blonde noticed that the smile did not reach those beautiful brown eyes. Arizona's own eyes had always been drawn to Callie's; they were always so expressive, so gorgeous, a window into Callie's soul. But right now they almost looked dead. They no longer sparkled. "How was the flight for you?"

Callie sighed. "Long. They circled Seattle for an hour before they had cleared the runway enough to land. I was afraid we were going to be rerouted and Sofia wouldn't make it to you in time for Christmas morning."

Arizona looked into Callie's exhausted eyes. She looked so tired, so worn down. "Well you have no idea how much you bringing her to me means to me, especially on Christmas Eve of all nights. I hope this flight didn't interfere too much with your holiday plans."

Callie shook her head. "I had a redeye leaving here in about 3 hours but it was cancelled because of the snow, so it doesn't much matter at this point what my holiday plans were. I saw a nice hotel near the hospital on the cab ride here, I'm heading over there after I leave to see if they have room for me to stay the night."

Arizona pulled back slightly to face her daughter, Sofia still wrapped in her arms. "Why don't you go put your shoes and coat in the laundry room sweetie? I will be right in and we can get going on our holiday plans. That sounds like an awesome plan to me. How does that sound to you?" Sofia nodded, pecking her mommy's cheek and heading into the house. Arizona stood up, looking at her ex-wife, the woman who once meant the whole world to her and in some ways still did. She looked at the downcast expression in her eyes and knew that for the sake of Sofia and the spirit of Christmas, they could put aside their differences and hurt and spend Christmas together. Even though they were no longer together, they were and would always be family. "Why don't you stay here? I have a guess bedroom and I know Sofia would love to have both of us around when she opens her presents tomorrow morning."

Callie shook her head. "I – I couldn't impose like that… I know this is your time to be with Sofia –"

"Callie," Arizona cut her off. "You are more than welcome to be here with us. Sofia would love it." And even though she knew she shouldn't, Arizona wanted to say that she would love it if Callie stayed too.

Callie still shook her head. "This is supposed to be time for you and Sofia and I don't want to get in the way of your time together. Plus I only packed one change of clothes, I am not prepared – "

"Callie, stop," Arizona cut her off again. "You are not getting in the way of anything. And you are welcome to borrow any of my things. Please, come in."

Callie reluctantly stepped over the threshold, shutting the door lightly behind her. "If you're sure…"

"Come on. I have plans to make hot chocolate and snuggle on the couch with Sofia. How does that sound?"

Callie smiled lightly and for the first time since Arizona had opened the door, Callie's eyes sparkled. "That sounds wonderful."

* * *

Arizona descended the stairs, Callie following close behind. What a night it had been. Per usual, Sofia had stayed up way past her bedtime even despite the time change. Her excitement had filled the house and she had spent the evening glued to Arizona's side. Arizona had not felt this light and carefree in months; there was really something special about having Sofia home and the joy that she brought was indescribable. The two women had settled on the couch under Arizona's softest blanket, Sofia planted happily between them. Sofia had spent almost two hours telling her mommy all about her life in New York and everything that had happened since they had last seen each other. Eventually Sofia had tired of talking and asked to watch _Frozen._ While that was not a Christmas movie, Arizona had not had the heart to deny her daughter anything, so the three girls huddled even closer together and watched Sofia's all-time favorite movie. Sofia had fallen asleep near the end of the movie, snoring sweetly and contentedly curled up between her two mothers. Callie had carried Sofia up to her room, placing her gently in her bed and giving her a light kiss on the forehead before leaving the room to allow Arizona some time alone to say goodnight. Arizona had made sure her daughter's blankets were perfectly arranged around her and had given her so many goodnight kisses, whispering sweet, loving things into her hear before gently and reluctantly backing out of the room. Even though Sofia was sleeping, Arizona had this constant pull toward her daughter. She could not seem to leave her side when all she wanted to do was spend time with her little girl.

"Why don't we put her gifts out now and then we can sit and have a glass of wine?" Arizona suggested, receiving a nod in response from Callie. The blonde led the way to the storage closet where Sofia's gifts sat stashed away, ready to be placed under the Christmas tree. Arizona threw open the door of the closet and Callie immediately started snickering behind her. "What?" she huffed.

"Nothing, nothing," Callie said still giggling. "You just definitely know how to spoil her."

Arizona spun around to look at her ex-wife. "Hey. She isn't around a lot for me to spoil her so I need to take advantage of the times I can."

A look of something Arizona could not put her finger on flashed quickly over Callie's face. "Yeah, well let's get these out so we can sit down and have a glass of wine. It's been a long day."

Twenty minutes later, all the gifts had been neatly arranged under the tree and Arizona walked back into the living room, two glasses of wine in hand. Handing one to Callie, she settled in on the opposite end of the couch from her ex-wife, turning slightly to face her. She sighed as she took the first sip of her wine, eyes meeting Callie's over the rim of her glass.

"So how is everything at Grey Sloan?"

"Honestly, very good. I have been doing so many interesting surgeries, saving so many babies and I have never loved my job more. Alex's trial is coming up after New Year's, but I'm trying not to think about that. I can't think about that right now."

Callie shook her head, taking a big sip of wine. "I can't believe he would punch someone like that. I mean I know he has a temper, but gosh."

"I could have killed him when I found out," Arizona grumbled. "I am still upset at him. I so thought he had grown up. Oh Murphy is back in the residency program."

"Oh is she?" Callie asked, sending a smirk to Arizona.

Arizona rolled her eyes. "Yes she is. But she is not interested in maternal-fetal medicine so I don't see much of her. How is Penny though?"

That strange look crossed over Callie's face again, but she hid it quickly. "She's good," she said, voice high. "You know, just uh very busy…" She took another sip and changed the subject very quickly. "Are you seeing anyone?" she asked, trying to sound nonchalant but voice cracking slightly.

The blonde chose to take a big sip of her wine right then, giving her time to answer. "Uh no – no," she stammered out. "No one right now."

Callie nodded. "No one catching your eye?" she asked quietly.

"Something like that," the blonde replied, glancing at the Christmas tree to avoid Callie's suddenly very focused gaze.

"Well cheers to a very happy daughter and an exciting morning ahead of us," Callie said holding her glass out to Arizona's. "And thank you again for letting me stay. You were right. Sofia is loving every second of this."

Arizona slowly met her glass to Callie's and then finished her glass. "You're welcome Callie. Anytime."

* * *

Two glasses of wine later and the two women were laughing at Arizona's story of something April did the other day at the hospital.

"I have no idea what she was thinking," Arizona choked out between laughs. "She has been a nut case since she and Jackson started circling around each other again. I think it's only a matter of time before they get back together."

Callie giggled. "Kepner is always a crazy one. But I think you're right. They are made for each other."

Arizona's laugh gradually faded and she looked intensely over at Callie. This was the closest she had been to her ex-wife, both physically and emotionally, since the divorce. This was the first time they had really sat and talked about something not concerning work or Sofia, and Arizona realized how much she had missed this. She had missed Callie not only as her wife but also as her friend. And, she thought to herself, Callie was more beautiful than she remembered. The woman's beauty never faded. Callie's wavy black hair hung loosely on her shoulders and there was a flush in her cheeks from the wine. God, her ex-wife was gorgeous. Arizona had seen other beautiful women, but none as beautiful as Callie. None drew her to them quite like Callie did. "Callie? Can I ask you a question?"

Callie swallowed and nodded, her face growing more serious as if she sensed the shift in mood.

"Does Penny know you're staying with me? And how is she okay with you missing your holiday plans with her?"

Callie's eyes rolled to the ceiling and she took a deep breath, as if deciding how she wanted to answer the question. She finally met Arizona's eyes, finding the blonde staring at her, eyes soft and caring. "Uh, Penny and I… there is no Penny and I anymore," she said so quietly that Arizona almost did not hear it. "We broke up a few months ago."

Arizona's eyes narrowed in confusion. "What?"

Callie nodded slowly, eyes on her wine glass. "I – We weren't working anymore. She was so busy with her grant and… and we never saw each other anymore and we just weren't working out," she finished in a rush. Arizona's eyes were still narrowed in confusion when Callie's eyes met hers. The blonde saw her ex-wife sigh in defeat. "And she said that she couldn't be with someone who was in love with someone else."

Arizona's stomach sank and she didn't know why. "Is there someone else in New York?"

Callie shook her head slowly, eyes still connected with Arizona's. "No. There's never been anyone else."

Arizona's heart started beating rapidly. "Callie… what do you mean? If you're still in love with Penny you should fight for her..."

Callie shook her head more forcefully this time. She put her wine glass on the coffee table, as if gearing for an intense conversation. "Arizona, Penny was right. I am in love with someone else. And I think now that maybe I never stopped being in love with her."

"Callie…."

"And I wish it hadn't taken me moving across the country to figure this out. But Penny was completely right. I am in love with someone. I am in love with _you_."

Arizona looked away from Callie's intense stare. "No…no. Callie, it has been three years. We are divorced. You can't come to me on Christmas Eve telling me you're still in love with me."

Callie shifted closer to the blonde. "Yes I can," she said with determination. "I can tell you that because it is the truth. It was not my plan to come here and tell you this tonight. But I have wanted to talk to you, really truly talk to you about how I feel for months now. I knew even before Penny and I broke up. Being in New York, being away from you, really showed me what I was missing. And I can't believe that I have spent three years without you because now I never want to spend another minute away from you. Being across the country from you… some days I have wanted nothing more but to pick up and come back home. But I made the choice to move to New York so I had to deal with the consequences of my decision. But… I have wanted to tell you this for so so long. I thought you had moved on, except from what you said earlier you haven't. And now that I have told you how I feel, I feel so free. Arizona, you need to know that I am in love with you. I _love_ you. And I am not going to take it back. I am not going to say that I don't mean that. Because I have never been more sure of anything in my life. You don't have to be alone. You don't have to be on your own. I am here and I love you."

Arizona looked at the ceiling, desperately trying to hold the tears in. How many nights had she laid in bed wishing to hear those words? "Calliope… It's been three years," she repeated. "We are both so different than we were when we were last together. We can't just go right back to that."

"But we can move forward. Together," Callie said adamantly, moving even closer to Arizona and taking her hand. "My time in New York really showed me what I want. I had a lot of time to find myself and to heal after our divorce, and what I found is that I am nothing on my own. I am nothing without you. You make me feel indescribably happy. You make me a better person and I don't want to spend another minute across the country from the person who makes me feel whole. I think that we needed to be truly separated to be able to come back together. Arizona, you are my soulmate. You have always been the one. Tell me you don't feel the same."

A tear rolled down Arizona's cheek. "You are the one for me too. You are the reason no one else has caught my eye. And I know it has been three years and I should have moved on. But how could I move on when I knew exactly what I wanted? And even though I thought we could never be together ever again, I couldn't help but hold out hope that we could figure ourselves out and find our way back to each other. But I am so scared. I am scared that we will fall into the same habits as before. Losing you once was hard enough. I won't survive if I lose you again."

Callie reached out and brushed a piece of silky blonde hair behind her ex-wife's ear. Her fingers lingered on the blonde's cheek and Arizona sighed, leaning into Callie's touch, her eyes fluttering closed. "I am not going anywhere. I don't know what the future holds for us, but I can promise you that I will be around for all of it. I don't want to experience anything again without you by my side."

Arizona opened her eyes and saw that Callie had moved closer to her. Those beautiful, expressive brown eyes seemed to see directly into her soul. Callie was telling her everything she ever wanted to hear, but could they ever be _them_ again? Could they be the perfect loving couple they once were? "But… you're still living in New York…"

She was cut off by Callie's lips pressing softly to her own. She went stiff for a moment as Callie wrapped her into her arms, but then relaxed and began to kiss Callie back. She kissed Callie with all of the built up passion and hurt and love that had occupied her mind for the past three years. Another tear rolled down her cheek as she tangled her fingers in Callie's beautiful wavy hair. It felt perfect to kiss Callie again. It felt like coming home.

Callie pulled back from the kiss first, sniffing back tears as well. "I love you, Arizona. You are it for me, there will never be another. Please, please give me the chance to prove to you how much I still love you."

Arizona pressed her forehead to Callie's, the familiar scent of the brunette overwhelming her with emotion. "I love you," she replied, voice full of emotion. "Please come home."

Callie pressed her lips to the blonde's again, this kiss sweet and soft and full of love. Pulling back, she said, "I would love nothing more than to come home. You are my home."

Arizona's soft laugh was strangled with emotion. She wrapped the brunette into her arms, nuzzling into her neck. "This is the best Christmas gift I could have ever asked for."

Callie pulled back, wiping a tear from Arizona's cheek. "Merry Christmas Arizona, my love."

"Merry Christmas Calliope."


End file.
